I have not been in the mood for blogging lately. I think it is because I am just so stressed out with the move, Christmas coming and everyday life. I am pretty good at being able to smile on the outside and just covering up with a joke or finding the positive in things. I have battled depression in the past and I have no intention of ever going down that road again, it leads to nothing but bad things.
Besides stress, living out of boxes and trying to meet with teachers in an already busy life....I had a disappointing support group meeting. I had a great speaker, awesome cookies and punch and hopes for a good turnout, only to have NO ONE show up! I was heart broken. I want this group to work, but I am wondering if I am just wasting my time. I know that the parties go well, but I wanted resources to be a big part of this also. Sometimes the vision that you have is not the one you get....I understand that. I just don't like it. But, I am not one to give up! And we are going to have some meetings so we can figure out how to make this a success. I know that it is needed....I just need to figure out a way to help other families of special needs kids see what I see.....that they are NOT alone and that there are more resources out there than they could ever even know. Also, I know some families with special needs kids who are amazing and they will be the first to admit that they can't do it without support.
On a lighter note, Eddie and I took Emily and Melody dream shopping today...we never really get a chance to leisurely look around stores. And while we were there we actually talked about stress and came to the realization that we are simply looking at things wrong. Instead of panicking about the move, we need to be thankful that we found a home that is safe and fits all our needs. Instead of feeling sorry for myself that I don't get to cook the kids dinner for Thanksgiving, I need to be thankful that we have somewhere to go and I am getting along with my in-laws well enough to be invited. Instead of worrying about getting the kids a huge Christmas, I need to be happy that I get to spend it with 7 great kids and a hubby that loves me. So, I need to get out of my slump and start looking at the bigger picture.
Well, it is my favorite time of the night....BEDTIME, a chance for peace and quiet and no cartoons playing on the TV.....Good night one and all.
I am sorry to hear that your support group had a disappointing turnout, to say the least, but glad that you are not giving up! I have always believed that whenever you are on the path that God has directed you on, the Devil will try to find ways to distract you from it. Your beautiful vision WILL bring help and healing! Plan another, and another and ten more if you have to - great things always start with a small step!
ReplyDeleteI read yesterday to surrender to God and not surrender to an activity!
ReplyDeleteHard to do. I will be praying that you hear God's plan for your group. Maybe another diection with the same theme, or different time, etc.
It is frustrating when you go to so much work to have no one show. I'm sorry.
Maybe God is giving you a bit of a breather for all that is happening now. One less thing to stress about!
I love your attitude tho. Keep strong friend!