We are not that kind of family anymore.....

Back in 2008 we made some decisions to turn our lives over to God and change our whole family dynamic. It was not an easy decision but it was one that I am so glad that we did. I stopped being closed off and scared to try new things and decided that Autism was not going to stop us from being a "normal" family. This year alone we went to the ocean for the first time, went to Disney and have done several new things without any problems. Sure we would do a few things different, like using Tobey's harness or tote around meds. But for the most part we were able to enjoy being a "normal" family.

I am the first to admit thought that we do live somewhat sheltered. I think everyone does. We tend to mainly hang out with our Church family, and people that need no explanation of the why Tobey is acting like that. I also admit that I am spoiled when it comes to our Church family, and they treat us like that "normal" family that we crave to be.

But on July the 4th we ventured into new territory and I seen how cruel the world can be. We decided to take the kids to Silver Beach. I had all of them in their Old Navy shirts. Emily and Melody looked so cute matching...But within 2 minutes of leaving the safety of my car the pointing and staring started. I even seen someone laugh at my Tobey Jude because of when he tried to talk and then we he had a meltdown a crowd started gathering to watch. We even had someone comment that he was an animal. The kids only got to enjoy about 10 minutes of actual swimming and we left early and missed fireworks.

Eddie and I talked that night after the kids were in bed and he told me that it was one of those days for him of "Why Me?". All those people saw was a little boy that was different and that scared them into ignorance. I came away with how could they not see 2 parents who are tired and stressed, and needed a day off from being "that family".

I know how blessed I am everyday to have my kids. I have read those poems about how God choose me to take of such special children....but that day no poem in the world was going to make up for feeling like an outcast.

I have no desire to ever go to St Joe Michigan again....I wish we had a beach here. So, there you have it, we are just not that kind of family.

Sorry if this was a downer, it has been weighing on me. Obviously, it's the 10th now....I will move on. I think we are going to recluse it for a little while before we venture out again, leaving the comfort of our dear South Bend.