Melissa's Guide To Facebook Etiquette....

After we moved we didn't have internet for a while. Eddie has a smartphone so we could get most of our interneting (is that a word?) done, I could stalk the crazies and we could look up phone numbers without the bother of knowing the alphabet and trying to use that stupid phone book.

Now that we are back online there are a few things that are driving me crazy, and so now I will give you my ideas on how not look like a jerk or idiot on Facebook.

1. You do not need to post about your dinner every night on Facebook. I am glad that you are eating dinner in this day and age, but there has got to be something bigger and better in your life that telling your 600 Facebook friends that you are eating meatloaf. Now, there is a loophole to this...a freind of mine the other day made Sushi, and that is impressive! So unless it's Sushi or some other monumental dinner (Thanksgiving, date night or your kids are covered in spaghetti) I am good.
2. Pertaining to numeral uno....I don't need to see a thousand recipes of things I don't have the energy to cook. If I am feeding my kids mac and cheese and I see a recipe for a lobster bisque, it makes me feel like crap. 
3. Keep the Drama down! I mean really? I know more about peoples relationships than I need to. There are some "friends" on Facebook that I hardly know in real life and because of their postings I know the most intimate details of their life. For one, that causes me to stalk you and it takes up my time, for two...somethings need to be kept in the home.
4. Stop posting thousands of memes! My gosh people! Unless it is important to you or makes you LOL or ROTFL you don't need to post it. I think 2 a day is sufficient, 3 if it has Charlie Brown. 
5. So, this one may make you hate me but it has to said. Not everything is life or death...unless it is. As a parent to special needs children it can get really old. If your kid has a cold, I am sorry but there are kids that have Cancer and the parents would give anything to the days of just dealing with colds. There are people I know that have dealt with infertility for years and I can only imagine the pain that it causes them to see parents complain about the stupidest things, like kids crying or being....wait for it....KIDS! You have a kid! It is not easy to raise children..I know that, but no one ever said it would be.
6. If you are really, I mean truly having the absolutely worst day ever than by all means post it and ask for prayers...if it is the worst day ever because you have a hangnail and you are stuck behind some slow drivers..... Well then let's get a grip and move on with life.
7. Okay, now we are getting a little personal here. I may have to block your butt if I need to worry that my husband see's your boobs, butt or other body part that should be covered up. Some things are better left to the imagination. Let's leave that there.
8. Be real. I am in shock at how some people are online and then nothing like that in real life. For example my Husband is sometimes inappropriate on Facebook and in real life he is the same way. You see what you get.... In that vein, I am no longer censoring my husbands stuff, because I have a job now :)
9. If I am posting a picture of Tobey Jude and he is not looking a little drugged out...I expect at least 100 likes and upwards of ten comments on how cute he is. Okay this one is not a real issue but man, it is so hard to get a good pic of that boy. I blame it on his Ritalin and excessive studliness.

So there you have it. Melissa's list on Facebook etiquette, and now I am am off to post some Autism awareness stuff and maybe a Charlie Brown pic :)