It's Melissa here. I'm back. I've composed myself and I believe I have done the proper amount of mourning for our dear friend, VIZIO. Now, I want to tell a little story about last night. It goes a little dark, but I promise there is a light at the end.
We have been tinkering with with the Monkey's (Tobey) medication, under a doctor's supervision of course. For several months now he has been on an ever increasing does of Ritalin. And, it is an amazing drug. For the first time in EVER, the monkey watches TV (part of the reason the flat screen fiasco {sub-parenthetical--it now has a name} happened), talks a little, focuses and, yes, even has conversations.
He will never give the emancipation proclamation, but his sentences are getting up to two and three words. Occasionally, he will even say a complete sentence out of the blue. Language is hard for the little dude. Some autistics draw or use computers to explain their needs and wants, but the monkey boy cannot do that...yet. So, right now is very frustrating for him.
Now, couple this with 0% impulse control. What is impulse control? Have you ever thought what it would feel like to stick your finger into a light socket? We all have, if even only briefly. However, that little voice inside of us says,"you idiot". Then we think better of it. Tobey does not have that voice. He is a very visceral person, meaning he reacts on a primal level. If he thinks he needs to punch something, he will. If he needs to watch Ni-Hao Kai Lin, he will. He is on risperidone for it, but we still have to keep an eye on the little guy.
So, now we have a little monkey dude who cannot express his frustration and what is making him upset couple with 0% impulse control.
Now, small children have this same problem. This is what happens when you see a temper tantrum in a store. The child is tired and does not feel their need are being met. They have no impulse control and then BOOM, temper tantrum.
Meltdowns are different. There is no stopping a meltdown. You cannot control it, you can only contain it. And during it, the person having it is often a danger to themselves, perhaps others. This is why when you see a special needs person having a meltdown, the best thing to do is NOT look and try to walk away, unless of course the situation calls for help. Then by all means, help. But extra attention only escalates it. And so does ignoring it. In fact, most meltdowns are escalated internally by the person having it.
Which brings me to the second difference between tantrums and meltdowns. During a tantrum, the child (hopefully) still recognizes you as the person in charge and is aware, although uncaring, of the surroundings.
During a meltdown, the person quite often "blacks out". They don't recognize you. They lose skills, though mostly it is temporary. and, in extreme cases, they can seize (seizure).
This is what happened last night. Mr. Monkey became agitated. He then worked himself into a frenzy...right as Eddie was starting dinner. It got to a point where we had to send the kids upstairs as they were loud and obnoxious, making the situation worse.
At one point, Tobey forgot how to use a fork. (we were trying to feed him before we put him to bed early). And, he had a seizure. Not a violent one, but he lost sense of the world for a few moments. As parent, it is times like this that scare the living hell out of you.
Eddie and I make jokes about the 'tism, and we make light out of these situations as best we can, because we feel that if we let it get to us, there will be no helping us. And that is a dark place to be.
Monkey is fine now. The next day is always a little weird because you don't know what they have lost. And it was not much. So, bonus!
In future posts, I am going to try and delve deeper into this subject as Eddie and I are going to be researching and approaching different treatment methods for Monkey boy.
Hey! Thanks for letting me vent!
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